10 down, 30 to go...

Just an update on where we are with the pregnancy: I am officially 10 weeks along. We have our 12 week appointment Jan. 12th, and I can't wait. I have no idea whats going on inside with the fetus, as far as its health, so I'm looking forward to making sure everything is okay and hopefully, I'll get to hear the heartbeat.

Our little baby is now the size of a prune! It still has a massive cranium, which is the same size as it's body...dear god, I hope that changes. There are some pretty big heads in my family...well, one in particular, sorry Calvin. The fetus, which already has tiny, little muscles, now has little indentations on its legs where the knees and ankles will be. The tiny arms already have elbows which is so cute because the arms are about the same size as this number 1. So our baby has this big headed, T-Rex thing going on right now. How cute! Only something a mother could say. Its even has tiny buds of baby teeth growing beneath the gums. The fetus also has all of it's organs, or at least the beginnings of them all. The kidneys are even producing urine already. How strange is that?! A prune that pees.

I'm still super tired and naps are now a necessity, not a luxury. You might think I'm lazy, but hey, I'm building a human here, and it takes alot energy. These naps are for the baby, not me. So I guess I'll just keep on sacrificing. The naps probably sound great, but the nausea that I thought was going away, is still going strong. This week the queasiness has been at its worse. But I'm still optimistic that by week 13, it will magically be gone...and I don't want to hear otherwise.

I look pretty much the same. I've gained two pounds, but that's pretty normal for me. It's not unusual for me to gain 2 lbs and lose 2 lbs within a month. So, I'm not worried...yet. My stomach is a little rounder and yes, I'm totally saying that's all uterus...and again, I don't want to hear otherwise. However, if I look like I might be heading towards gaining 40-50lbs, please stop me, by force if necessary. I'm really hoping to gain only 25lbs and I'm feeling pretty determine, but, we'll see what happens. I'm kind of hoping to be like one of those Teen Moms, who have a baby and one week later they're wearing a size 2 and a bikini. And yes, I do watch Teen Mom, don't judge me, it makes me feel better about my life.

So that's the latest with me the pregnancy. I'll keep everyone posted on Baby Weight-Gate ( my version of Watergate). Feel free to comment, I'd love the feed back. And if there is a problem with the grammar, forgive me, I went to Romulus Public Schools.

"morning" sickness

For every woman who has ever been pregnant, they already know. Its like a big secret that you only find out about when you experience it. Well, I feel like I need to spill the beans-"Morning" sickness, is more like "All Day" sickness. I'm sure I'm going to loose my woman card for this, but I just find that name a little misleading, which irritates me, because at the moment, everything irritates me.

To be honest, I haven't had it all that bad. I thought I might be one of those women who never felt sick the entire time. I was 8 weeks pregnant without a twinge of queasiness. I almost thought there might be something wrong with me until the nurse I saw said, " no honey, don't worry about it, you're just one of the lucky ones." Well, I like the way that sounds. So I'm superior in just one more way, I am a Logan. Later I saw the doctor, who informed me that I was, in fact, 6 weeks pregnant, not 8, and that I might start feeling a little sick. I almost laughed when she said that. Obviously, she doesn't know me, and know I'm one of the "lucky ones".

Prov. 16:18: "Pride is before a crash, and a haughty spirit before stumbling."

Even though, the evening before that appointment I was feeling a little sick, I just chalked it up to my normal sensitive stomach. Most definitely not morning sickness. I was in for big upset. Soon I began feeling a little sicker, a little more often, until I was sick all day long. Fortunately, I don't get very sick. I just have a slight queasy feeling all day long. Sometimes its a little better, sometimes its a little worse. Its more of an annoyance than anything else. I found little, semi-cures: never have an empty stomach and someone recommended Preggie Pops, candies made just for morning sickness.

I'm soon to be entering my tenth week or pregnancy and the sickness should began to ease. Just one more reason I can't wait for the 2nd trimester.

i might be a hypochondriac...

For years Andrew has been saying I'm a hypochondriac. I completely disagree. If I feel like I have a symptom of something, I'm going to get it checked out because I'd rather be safe than sorry. So what if I go to the doctors once a month. Or, who cares if I don't notice the symptom until after I watched a Dateline special on mysterious illnesses or read an Awake article. I'm just cautious. Right?

Over the last weekend, I felt like I was having some strange symptoms and I thought something might be wrong with the pregnancy. I know how I get, so I knew better then to research my symptoms online. I was really worried I was having a miscarriage, a major concern of mine. So on Monday, I call my ob office and told the nurse what was going on, which she didn't seem the least bit concerned about. She pretty much said I should just wait it out. Are you kidding me?! Wait it out while my baby falls out? Unacceptable. That only made me mad. So a few hours later, I called again and told the nurse, "I'm really freaking out about it, I'd really like to come in". So, finally, they force me into the schedule because I'm having a "miscarriage".

A doctor walks in, examines me and does an ultrasound, STAT, only to find a perfectly healthy little baby with a wonderful little heart beat. I feel like such a idiot and apologized over and over again. She said it was fine and that I'm not the 1st person to do this. But I'm pretty sure my chart will be flagged: HYPOCHONDRIAC.

So, after this experience, I won't say I'm a hypochondriac, but I might have hypochondriac tendencies....scratch that, I'm just very cautious and in tuned with my body is all.

So here's a picture of an ultrasound. It's not much to look at but now our embryo has arms and legs, even little muscles. During the ultrasound it kind of looked like a little floating gummy bear. I even got to see it move around. At the end of this week, we graduate from embryo to fetus.

We still have about 4 weeks to go until the 2nd trimester, so we're not out of the woods, but everything looks good so far.

i'm so angry!

My hormones have been changing, making me slightly insane. Normally, I'm not much of a crier, but a couple days ago I got misty eyed over a commercial, sad, but true. In addition to the tears, pregnancy has also brought me insane rage! I feel like I could turn into the Incredible Hulk at any second, over the littlest things. At work I try to be a mild tempered, loving christian, but lately its taking everything I have to refrain from pounding my chest and ripping down doors. I find more and more that the tiniest things get my blood boiling and me seeing red. So I'm working on trying to be rational and realizing yes, people are stupid, but it doesn't give me a right to be a raging maniac. Acceptance is the first step. Hi, my name is Makenzie, and I'm a raging hormonal maniac.

life stinks...

One of the 1st symptoms of pregnancy is an overly sensitive sense of smell, not to mention excessive saliva, so if you see my pillow, don't judge me. At first, I didn't really notice my keen sense of smell, I just thought Andrew had worst gas then usual. But when I realized I could smell him on a different floor of the house, I knew something was up.

Its kind of amazing and disgusting all at once. I can smell things a mile way. Its like I have my own super power. Unfortunately, EVERYTHING stinks!! I love every kind of body butter from the body shop. Or I did. Now when I put lotion on my hands, I have to put my hands in my pockets or behind my back, neither of which do anything to hide the smell. The smell is so powerful it makes me gag. Even taking a shower is a chore now. The soap is so over powering it induces dry heaving.

Why not buy unscented everything? Because 1st, I can't afford to buy brand new everything just because the smells are horrendous. 2nd, those fancy unscented soaps and lotions do have a scent that my super nose picks up on and hates. So I'll just count down to the 2nd trimester, aka, the "Honeymoon Phase." But truthfully, if this is as bad as it gets, then I'll be grateful, because I've heard some unbelievable war stories....mostly involve digestion...and I'm scared!

Say Cheese

We had our 1st prenatal doctor appointment Nov. 19th. At the time, the doctor thought I was close to 9 weeks along, but I had my doubts. After having the ultrasound, the verdict was in- instead of being nearly 9 weeks, I was barely 6 weeks along. Even though this is closer to where I thought I was, it means now there are 7 more weeks of nail biting and trips to the bathroom to make sure I'm not spotting, to go. However, there was a beautiful little heartbeat, fluttering away.

Take a look at our baby's very first picture. It kinda looks like a little ball at the moment. At 6 weeks its about half the size of a baby pea.

shhh, its a secret

I'm currently only 8 weeks along and only a very few, select people know about the pregnancy and we really want to keep it that way for the next 5 weeks. So please honor our wishes and keep your lips sealed! But congratulations, you made the cut.

So We're Having a Baby!

November 11th, 2010

It'd been a about 8 weeks since my last cycle, but my cycle is crazy like that and I've been under so much stress and loss so much weight, so I didn't think much of not having a period. But, since I have been under so much stress and alcohol has become oh so tasty and such a good friend of mine, I figured I should probably take a pregnancy test just to be sure.

So at 9:50 at night, I roll up to my local Target, looking "suburban chic" in a flannel, buffalo plaid shirt, torn jeans, glasses, and a messy (not messy cute, messy scary) ponytail. And to top it all off, big, beautiful puffy eyes, thus the glasses, from crying...something I do now, pretty regularly and I'm really good at it. I've got ten minutes to grab a test, and because I'm so eager to laugh at how silly I am to have thought I might be pregnant and even went to the store in the middle of the night to find out, I also have to squeeze a trip to the Target bathroom to use the test in those ten minutes too.

So after pacing in a surprisingly clean handicap stall for 2mins, I look down and see 2 lines. This is clearly a mistake. That's what you get when you buy the cheap target brand, a false positive....right?!? Now I'm really mad! I spent $4 on that test, now I have to go back and buy a $10 digital test just to be sure. I've now got 4 minutes to spend more money just to prove that the Target brand isn't as good as the national brand. In 2 minutes flat I'm pacing again in my stall and some strange letters pop up on the test, Pregnant.

I would love to say that I was happy and relieved or that this was the answer to all my prayers, but it wasn't. If there was ever the worst timing for anything, this was it. My wonderful cookie-cutter life was now a complete disaster and now to add a perfectly innocent baby to this train wreck was to much for me to comprehend. I was still holding on to the possibility that those test were wrong.

With my head still spinning, I drove home and told Andrew. We had actually been trying to get pregnant for nearly a year, which gave me plenty of time to concoct a fun way to tell him we were pregnant. But two months earlier we decided now is definitely not the time to have a baby. So when I got home, those ideas and plans were a million miles away. I simply said, "Hey, wake up. I think we're pregnant and its not my fault."

Still holding on to the idea it was a false positive, which I experienced before, I called my doctor and told her I didn't want an appointment, just a blood test. 6 hours later I had the results, I'm pregnant.

The first few days were a roller coaster of emotions, bouncing from shock, excitement, guilt, fear, and ending on pure happiness. The timing couldn't be worst and this is definitely not the perfect way I'd been planning for so long to start my family, but I'm having a baby either way. I gave myself 4 days to be selfish, angry, and bitter, but now its time for me to move on and enjoy what is to come...a baby with thick hair, big thighs, glasses, and braces.